My friend D’Anne Hotchkiss is an honest and courageous listener. She is the kind of listener who takes the time to savor the nuances and the deep truths of what someone tells her.
I would say that D’Anne is someone who sees clearly, who does not really have mental fog. We each thought it would help us, and be enjoyable, to trade posts and share our perspectives.
Thank you, D’Anne!
Years ago, my high school friends and I were prone to respond to ‘How are you?” by saying, ‘fair to partly cloudy.’
On one level, it was just silliness, but on another level, even then we sensed we were somehow struggling. Too much homework. Too many commitments. Too many shiny objects begging for our attention.
While physical fog obscures our vision, mental fog obscures our thinking.
Sometimes the fog creeps in gradually. Too many tasks, too little sleep, no time to recharge our batteries. One day we realize we’re moving along at half-speed, forgetting the kids at school, always searching for the car keys. Wondering if we’ve losing our minds.
Sometimes the fog descends swiftly and suddenly. A routine medical test reveals a life-threatening disease, a job is lost, a marriage ends. Enveloped in mental fog and unable to see the future, we stand still.
Fortunately, just like the warmth of the sun burns through a morning fog and restores visibility, we can burn off mental fog by following just a few simple steps.
Delegate tasks that can’t wait and postpone the others to make time in your calendar. Think you can’t? Imagine you’ve broken your leg and you’re in the hospital under heavy sedation. Which projects would someone else pick up, which ones would get jettisoned or at least postponed?
Now, with those things on someone else’s plate or scraped into the bin, use the time to do for yourself. Take a brisk 30-minute walk. Read. Meditate. Take a nap. Repeat each day until the fog begins to lift.
Then, make specific plans to do things differently. Replace the shiny objects with intentional actions that restore your soul: time with friends, regular exercise, quiet contemplation. If you’re suffering from an emergency situation, take steps to address it, whether that means seeing another doctor, applying for public aid or finding a lawyer.
When we’re in a physical fog, we can’t do much except wait for the weather conditions to change. In the meantime, on the other side of the fog, the sun and the wind are doing their jobs to bring us bright clear skies.
When we’re in a mental fog, we may be tempted to think we have to wait for it to pass. But the truth is, it doesn’t pass on its own. We have to be on that other side, taking actions to lift the fog. Self-care is part of being honest, open and true to ourselves.
Every life has its foggy patches. We can’t avoid them, but we can take regular care of ourselves to minimize their occurrence and to help us work through the others.
How do you keep away the mental fog? What are your favorite ways to care for yourself?
D’Anne Hotchkiss has a passion for helping people connect through conversations that are Honest, Open and True. Connect with her at LifeIsHOTBlog and on Twitter, @lifeishotblog.
[Image by LifeisHOTblog]
